Livin' La Vida Leisure

Let’s cut to the chase: This blog is first and foremost about a leisurely lifestyle. Which I am all for. But being leisurely is better when you have the best of leisure: A stylish new swimsuit, Jackie-O shades, coconut sunscreen, a cushy chaise-longue, a delectable trashy novel, and a cool, refreshing beverage. This would all be enjoyed near some type of water source, such as a lake or a pool. Even better if there is an age-inappropriate pool boy. No, I am not a pedophile, you sicko! As long as they’re over 21 I can look.

Recently, I was given the opportunity to do just this. I nannied for a family for a week. In between mediating hormonal, adolescent combat like “GET OUT OF MY ROOM!” “She’s touching me!” and the like, peppered with bursts of irrational crying, a smattering of [fake] earsplitting screeching, and a dash of emotional rollercoaster acrobatics, we went to the pool. The pool where [I used to work] and a fine specimen of a college lifeguard had a summer job. While the girls were off playing with friends, I was basking in the fortunate weather and really living the high life. Friends, Country Club Momming is where it’s at. And by the way, I used to be the lifeguard who was essentially RAISING YOUR KIDS and teaching them manners, so I think a little karma is in order here. However, I don’t want to be one of those moms who does all this and has a nanny there. That is just plain lazy. Be lazy in the comfort of your own homes! Don’t make others look at it.

This whole experience has made me ask the big question: Can one be a Woman of Leisure and have kids? Must they be out of the house before you can attain leisure status? It’s hard to be leisurely when you’re refereeing. Comments on this are welcome.

Read this!

Do I have a new book for you! “Green with Envy: Why Keeping up with the Joneses is Keeping Us in Debt” by Shira Ross is the newest book for the smugal collection. Now, if you are like me, you might think that you are too smart for this book. But wait! It’s not your typical personal finance book! The author talks about how, by comparing ourselves with others who [we think] have higher financial status, we constantly scramble to keep up with “the Joneses”, and thus plummeting ourselves into debt. Ross shows us how this can happen gradually, over time, and even those of us who are smugal can get caught up in this cycle, even if we think we’re too smart. Ross also gives us some tips about dealing with the stress and anxiety of money troubles, and offers some resources on www.greenwithenvythebook.com. Read it! I’m telling you. Oh! And she also says that the universe has a way of flowing money to you when you need it, so I’m all about that. Next up: I'm going to check out Suze Orman's "Young Fabulous & Broke" if I can afford to pay my library fine...

Addendum to Mascara Proclamation

I found out the hard way that my first love of mascaras, Max Factor's Lash Perfection, does indeed have limitations. Ladies: if you go swimming, it is in your best interests to remove mascara beforehand. Otherwise it will look like you met the business end of some brass knuckles in a dark alley. Some of us had to walk around a pool for 20 minutes before we found this out.

New Product Testing

OK, I just blew $30 at Target on new skincare. I am testing out Almay's new line of skincare for dry skin. My skin is drrrry, and there's hardly any other face products out there for it, like I'm some anomoly or something! I also was misguidedly feeling rich, so I bought the hydra-compact makeup thing for dry skin, too. Today was my first day. Like the compact. It goes on kind of wet feeling, which I actually like. We will see if it can stand the time-test! Stay tuned!

Making the World a Better Place

Attention, ladies! I am issuing a summer public service announcement: I can still see your bra straps when you wear clear-strap bras. You may think you're being classy by not Britney-Spearsing your lingerie, but I am here to tell you that you are only one step above. One step. What is so wrong with strapless? Why can't women just get behind the strapless?? I have some, they're awesome, you just have to get one that fits. PLEASE, PLEASE do so you can quit offending my eyes.

New Strategy

So my sister just took this course on "Psych-K" (http://psych-k.com/home.php) which has something to do with your subconscious, and basically if you have a session about a particular issue, all your dreams and fantasies will come true. Or something. She swears it gave her husband a new (better) personality. So she's testing it out on family volunteers. I just did a session on finding an awesome, make-me-rich job, plus a totally rad future husband. Now I can kick back and watch the magic happen. I'll let you know if anything becomes of my subconscious allowing me to find employment. Or something. Also, wouldn't this be the best-ever exercise for "Starting Over"??

Smugal Tip-of-the-Week

Thank you, Sarah F. for today's smugal tip! Join Noodles e-newsletter and get free entrees! http://www.fishbowl.com/clt/ndls/lp/join/join.asp (I don't know if that will link...) You sign up and they email you a coupon. Then they send you more every once in a while. It totally works, I just redeemed mine a few weeks ago. Doesn't get better than free dinner!

Updates

Mascara Update:
OK, Fans, some of you have been on pins-and-needles, dying to know if I finally ventured to K-Mapart for Max Factor. The verdict is in! LOVE it! The brush is totally the same as Queen Latifah's, there is a patent violation in there somewhere. But it washes off a little cleaner, and I don't get those flakes down my face in the middle of the day. Definitely worth the trip to the posh suburban store, which is the only K-Mart I will even set foot in. I just went to their Web site and it looks like you can order online, if you're a sucka and want to pay shipping.

Drinking Update:
Don't worry, no one needs to call AA. I am so over drinking during the day. I don't think I could even do it more than twice. It's boring and limiting. Though I just read "Little Alters Everywhere" and I have been dying for a G&T ever since.

Target/Fashion Update:
My new friend Brian has asked me about Luella at Target. I am scared of Luella. She is not for amatuers, but you know little pre-teen suburban hussies are running around in this stuff. Or, worse, middle-aged women who should be wearing no such thing. In general, we should just leave London-cutting-edge-chic to the professionals.

I agree Brian that some Isaak Mizrahi pieces are frightening...I still shudder at the sweater seared in my brain that was orange-and-fuscia striped. But sometimes he is on the mark, and his shoes are usually FAB. Though a little pricey, Target-wise.

World's Fastest Rejection

OK, so I've been delinquent because the weather has been great, I've been working in my yard, dogsitting, etc. But I've recently kicked my job search into high gear. I was getting all pumped, calulating what the percentage is for application to interview ratio, working on my data, etc. So I was pretty pumped to have had an interview this morning. The proximity was perfect: 1.5 miles from my house. Walkable in Spring/Summer. Kitty-corner from where my mom volunteers all the time (free lunch,ya heeerd?). Across the street from Wendy's (Frostys, y'all!). Friends, I got an email rejection 2.5 hours after I left the building. Does that happen?? It's nice they didn't lead me on, but can't they at least pretend to think about it?? I am so sure!

The pain was great. Great. But nothing a banana-coconut frappuccino can't help soothe. This elixer has helped me to see that I don't want to work for a place where the (Vice President) interviewer LITERALLY interviews me while wearing a sloppy sweatsuit and flip-flops. Can we talk about that for a second? I don't care who you are. I don't care where you work. I don't care what your dress code is. You. Do. Not. Interview. People. While. Wearing. Lougewear. Where is Stacey London?? I felt totally overdressed in my appropriate attire. It is so absurd for her (as the hostess) make me (the guest) feel uncomfortable. Unforgiveable. Bastards!

Yippee! Someone just called for an interview. That other chick can suck it.