Living with the 'rents is slowly but surely becoming a living hell. See Exhibits a-j:
a) Citations from the laundry police for washing towels with clothes, for not pulling t-shirts out to line dry, for attempting to wash too small a load, and for using too much detergent.
b) Forced to watch a special on molecular physics instead of "So you think you can dance."
c) Am forced to eat vegetables at every meal.
d) While scavenging for deoderant, found something that I NEVER. EVER. needed to know about.
e) Am sleeping in cat hair.
f) Did I mention that my parents live in a garbage house and there aren't any clear surfaces?
g) They ran out of gin.
h) They ran out of wine.
i) Got chastised for using the "wrong" pair of scissors.
j) Referneces to pop culture and WB celebrities are met with blank stares.
I think you get the gist. I know you are smarting with outrage and injustice like I am.
My fecal-scented house is looking better and better. The plumber comes tomorrow, and if he can't fix it right away, I think I'll have to just live without running water...Laura Ingalls Wilder did it, right?
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3 comments:
OMG. This is the best post yet. Poor, poor FWOL! Get thee to the liquor store. Everything will seem better.
Also, stop saying fecal.
Oh, love! My current roommate is gone for the month. Come back (priceline will give you a cheap ticket if you fly at insane times like 3AM) and we can relive old times. Also, I don't have gin, but I have beer, vodka, rum, whiskey, a variety of funky liquors courtesy of my roommate, wine, AND champagne. And we can always get gin at the liquor store across the street. For reals. COME VISIT! Please? I'll make it cheap and cook vegetarian delights for you at every meal...
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